Losing Someone

So, on last monday, I just heard this shocking news. One of my hometowny passed away. She was sick and that's was actually the 1st time I heard about her being sick. Honestly, I rarely know everything about home anymore. Since I lived in big city and I don't really ask about home thingy. Haha.

She's still young. I think around late 30 - early 40. I know her since I was young but it's been a while I haven't seen her. To be honest, when I heard that she's passed away, it didn't really hit me hard. It still shocking me since she's still young and I don't know about her being sick. But yeah, the bad news didn't hit me since you know everyone will be die someday. Just matter of time.

But then, I saw the pictures where all the family members gathered around her when she still in hospital and when she took her last breath. For the 1st time, it hit me real hard. Like, a father just lose her precious daughter, sisters just lose her precious sister, brothers just lose his sister, kids just lose their mother. Family just lose their loved one. Its' really sad and upsetting. I don't know what the family feels. It's surely devastated them. They are surely feel empty. 

I don't know but I feel like I don't have empathy at all.

Me and the kids

We were in Daiso. A shop where all the stuffs' price exactly RM2.50. I told them about it but I'm not really sure if they understand it. Anyway, they brought their own money and bragged about it all the time. Still, this Abby one still kept asking me for more money even for just like 20$. Most of the time I ignore her.

When we arrived in Daiso, they started looking for things they wanted especially, toys!!! Yes, toys!!! I mean they're kids afterall. When I told them to put it down, they will just said " I am gonna pay it with my own money. I have a lot of money. See??". Actually the money they have not more than 10$ or is it??? But I don't think its good to spend it on things like that. Like, I'm actually broke that I always cautious of things that I wanted. Adult problem.

And since its their money so I just let them take things they wanted but I set it to not more than 3. I think if I don't set it they might gonna buy the whole shop. When it's turn to ching the money and we lined up in counter, these kids literally squatting down and started to count down their money out from their little piggy banks, well more like small cases. In my nephew's case, he put his money on sweets little cup?? I don't what what we call it.

Anway, there's a lot of people also lined up but they casually counting their money exactly to RM2.50 each on the floor. I was like ".........." Come on!!! A lot of things happened actually but, I think next time I bring them out I have to prepare a lot of money and I don't think I am able to do soon. That's awful because I really want to bring them out often and having fun playing with them. I guess I'll just bring toys and play with them at home since bring them out cost a lot of money or I am the one who don't know how to treat them nice outside from home.

Me and my niece 2

We're in living room. Just chillin' out. I called Abby and asked her to comb my hair. She obediently said yes and started to comb my hair.

Suddenly,

Abby : Inai, a lot of your hair ' tumpah'.

Me and all of adults at home started to laugh. Like, it's really funny. I have a hairfall problem but I don't think it's huge problem.

Me : It's not 'tumpah'. It's 'gugur'. 

Haha. Personally, I never thought about how kids still don't know a lot of things and still learn about it. Recently, hanging out with them make me realize this and I found myself patiently teach them things that they don't know.

I also realized that the way they gonna be in the future depending on how we treat and teach them when they're still kid. So, I try my best to treat and teach them the way it should be.

Saving Celebrities Pictures

So, yeah, just like normal girls, I saved a lot of celebrities pictures in my phone. 

Pictures that catch my attention only. Usually something that I adores and want to be, or something that inspires me. Like hairstyle, clothes, shoes, etc. I don't save pictures randomly. So, yeah, I saved a lot of pictures. 

Just like this one. Well, this not a celebrity but I got interested with the hair. I have long hair right now and it's kinda like fascinating for me to just looking at this picture. Haha. 

Last year. Last month to be exact, my 13th years old niece came to my home and she's scrolling my phone gallery pictures. She stumbled on this pictures of Joy of Red Velvet. I love Joy. She's really pretty and got pretty long hair.

My niece : Who's this?

Me: That's Joy of Red Velvet. I like her hair. Just fyi, I saved this pictures coz I love the hair. I want to have hair like hers.

Her : uh-huh. So how about this? Do you want hair like his too?

The next photo was Daniel. This one.

I was like ah....

Me : No. I'm saving this picture coz I like the vest. I wanna make one for me. 

Haha..but really. I like Daniel's vest. And yeah, Daniel is handsome kid. I might saved this pictures not because of the vest but more because I got captivated by Daniel. Haha.

Okay, that was random. Bye!!

Happy New Year: 2018, Let's the journey begin!!

Hallo. Hi!!

Haha, I know its really late. Its 3rd January already and I happened wish you a Happy New Year. Yup after 3 or 2 days passed. Hope that 2018 will be a great year for you.

So talk about 2017. Erm, i don't know exactly but so many things happened last year, well, as usual, not a suprise to be honest. There will be a lot of things happen in that 365 days. 8760 hours. 525, 600 minutes. 31, 536, 000 seconds. If my calculations are correct. If its wrong, blame my calculator and my super not functioning brain. Haha.

2017 have been a blessed year for me because I woke up from my depression after facing it the whole year on 2016. I get up and stronger than ever. I was crybaby but I promised to myself that I'm not gonna cry easily anymore. I have to be strong for myself, my family and people around me. Depression is really-really hard. It can killed you. Yes, I actually have thought about that so many times but Thanks to God for remind me that there's still hope. A bright future ahead of me.

Talking about depression, last year we lost a great figure singer, Shinee's Jonghyun. I am not a Shawol but the news hit me hard. I don't know why, but I was actually crying over the sad news. Like, I know Shinee through SNSD and I know that they're closed friends who grow up together unknowingly.  And they're super cheery boys who I know lighten so many Shawols around the world. It's really a huge loss. I am gonna remember him playing around with Soshi. Jonghyun, you worked hard. RIP.

That's also remind me to appreciate whatever SNSD doing right now. I mean I am gonna support whatever decisions they make. Like not continuing being a female girl group or get married. I mean as long as they happy. They already worked hard for the past 10 years and now its time to settle down, I think. Haha. But like I said, as long they're happy. If they happy to be SNSD and keep promoting as SNSD then I'm more than happy. If they want to settle down then that's okay for me too.

Reading post from Sunny or photo from Taeyeon or any of them, celebrating new year with their family and friend for the 1st time since debut really make me happy. Happy that they finally got time to celebrate it with their love one and not you know, sitting, perform, greet and get bored on musc festival. Except for Yoona. She's MCing MBC Music Festival but hey, she celebrated it with her juniors and they not let Yoona alone, so yeah, I am happy.

Then talk about celebrating New Year, I don't know but I feel I don't want to celebrate it for the 1st time. Like new year just a new year. Another year like last-last year. And I went home so early from End of Year Celebration just to watch tv at home. I mean I was excited last year and this year I didn't. But I know, that feeling just temporary. Next year, I might celebrate it way more excited.

Last year, I went to many places and did so many things, so I'm satisfy with myself. This year, I' ll try my best to achieved my goals so I can pat my head and say ' you've worked hard this year' later at end of year.

Last year too, I've been NCTizen and Wannable. It was a great year to be fangirl. Haha. I stumbled to this group through SNSD, haha, as always. Right now, I am Wannable. I don't know how long I am gonna be one but I am gonna enjoy it while it lasts. And ya, I promised to make reviews on NCT Life. The whole NCT life but yeah, I don't know how I am gonna do that. I'll try my best to keep reviewing it and post it later. 

I think I loss for words and idea already. So, see you next time.